I do forget that these are the best times, the joy times. I asked for JOY last year. But it was a year of SURRENDER. May this be my year of Joy? I believe so. But to get there I have to allow it. Letting the days flow; by God's grace, not staggered hunched over bitter saying - time wasting, wasting time.
Can I relax, and let things happen...
and learning grows not when being pushed?
Working within boundaries but not getting down on myself when MY plan doesn't follow through.
Isn't letting go always hard friends?
Time.
Can I give time to this family?
I forgot in months what I gained in a year of surrendering. My oh my, this Israel I am.
When will this Momma grow up and learn. To be a child is once. ONCE.
What's a couple months, really.
I went from..
First year, "Oh ya I'm just doing what God wants us to do. I'm picking curriculum that I asked God about. Totally in Him."
Forward to now.
Me...ME....Me.... ALL ME!
Yup folks, apparently I'm the master of my life and my kids.
Ya, nice one I know.
Control comes easy.
And letting go?
Ya, that's hard.
So on to Monday...
Monday - Husband took the crew to the dog wash in the city while I worked on scheduling and planning for our new year in our new home and had some much needed alone time. Much! The pooches came home clean, yay! The kids played outside at the neighbours a couple doors down all afternoon on their lovely little skating rink; where I was informed that the Momma of that house was the goalie. What a gal!
Tuesday - Daddy left for work. No tears just joy, for Gods blessing. And I can't remember much of that day except for taking a picture of the kijiji table the husband refinished on his days off.
Wednesday - Adventure on the river bank. Sliding down the river bank of ice was such fun and imagining a fortress under an uprooted tree is something the boys want to go back to. The dogs ran up and down that bank! Kids and poochies were tuckered out. I wish I had photos. Luckily I soaked in the time with them and remember it in here.
Eagle drew plans for the raft to get them across in summer and the tree fort for the backyard that evening.
I made a wee bit too much curry lentil soup for lunch.
It's been lunch 3 days in a row now, and there is still lots left in the fridge.
I'm learning how to cut back when the husband isn't home.
And hair cuts for the boys!
Thursday - Some book work was done in the morning during my time out.
A visit with home school families.
Oh what JOY. I seriously needed it that day.
****A little honesty - plug in.
I put this Mom in a time out this morning in her room.
When she yelled at the fireplace screen for falling off, I knew she needed a TIME OUT!
I've been obsessed with getting our home and schooling together that I forget to breath, to be IN HIM. And when I do take time to breath I allow myself to feel, to grieve the move, the loss of my community of women. I was feeling a tad overwhelmed this morning with hubs working away, the dogs, this bigger house, school (lack of), the kids, and
I wrote this this morning on my FB page:
"Oh boy. God help me get my cruddy selfish "i cant do this" attitude adjusted here in the next minute and be the mother I'm suppose to be. Think rainbows and sunshine... hey maybe even a cute cartoon unicorn in there too!!"
-unicorns??? hhahaa ah whatever floats your boat.
Texting my husband with tears, I wrote to tell him my troubles.
He called us on his lunch break and came to my rescue.
Put me in line and the kids too.
Thank God for husbands who answer the call to FATHER and HUSBAND well. He told us to read Matthew 5 and so I punched into bible gateway the address and let the sound of the word wash over me, and hopefully running over the boys as well.
As I write I'm reminded of when I received news of my Dad needing heart surgery, and it was simple. The kids and I ran to THE Father. It was easy, I plastered scripture on the walls and prayed. It was EASY to fall on the feet of Jesus for that crisis.
So why now, over such a simple life am I having trouble?
*********
While I had tea with three other lovely ladies. The kids, all 18 or so of them went sledding. When the littles came in my boys went for a walk with a couple older brothers and 3 dogs in our woods.
A list of what God provided on their walk:
The oldest lad of the bunch rattled off information about the beaver lodge they saw, red willow being used for bows by the natives, and latin names for plants in the bush. Wow! That was a school day right there in that hour walk. Maggie dog also chased a semi - yes you read right, she ran out onto the highway and chased a very large transport truck while other vehicles honked horns to get her off. Ya, good thing she's cute!
It's Friday.
All week I reviewed my schedule guideline for the rest of the academic year, printed, cut, laminated, cut some more. And I can now see the carpet in the loft.
It's no longer filled with piles of paper and plastic cut-offs.
We tidied house today and baked for visitors this afternoon.
A family who moved out this way from where we used to live. Good to connect with the familiar.
I ordered All About Spelling level 1 today. After a few years looking at it I dove in today. My husband also requested that I purchase Exploring Creation Anatomy for him and Eagle to work on together on his days off from work. So once I post this it's on to christian book to click the button for that book and most likely others, can't resist.
Tomorrow's doggie class is coming soon, it's after midnight, so it's soon off to the hay stack for me.
Joys of the week
Love the image of creativity!
All three with Lincoln logs before bed at Eagles desk.
Someone was playing with my phone.
Mo
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