I signed up for the read your Bible in 90 days through Mom's Toolbox. This post is to explain in great detail that I can't hide from the fact that I'm just not cutting it.
I peer pressured myself into trying to read the Bible in 90 days, because a whole bunch of cool blogging mom's did. I started out strong, then I got into Exodus and IT happened.
I'm only on day 8, no joke, day 8.
I'd like to line up all the excuses for why I'm so behind. But I... will.
I'm a lot like most of you. I have 3 kids, I'm in my second year of homeschooling, I don't plan or schedule much and I have a 6 month old that wakes often through the night (still, ya I know-).
I really had lofty goals. I'm OK with that, but not. I hate not finishing.
Growing up I was the typical procrastinating non-finisher type. Ya know those. Start something enormous and wait till the last minute to even start the thing before a deadline and just don't finish at all. Yes I was one of those, I had to do a whole year of college over because of it.
I set myself up, I missed some signs posted that read major delays. My kids wake at 7-8. The baby still wakes at night. So I planned for early to bed = early to rise, which worked for a good chunk of time. Then my husband went on night shift, blowing my whole early to bed = early to rise theory out the window. Then the baby and I got a cold = 3 day major delay. So in all my resourcefulness, I've tried sneaking my reading in during the day or before bed. Nope, you guessed it, it didn't work. How can I focus on scripture throughout the day or when I'm tired and ready for bed. I like most people, need to read His word in the morning. It's the hour or hour 1/2 that it's taking that's killing me right now.
As the saying goes, I tend to bite off more than I can chew and this is one of those moments.
I started to realize that I might not finish on time when all I could read in a day were a few chapters. One day shortly after, I looked at the calendar and then at my handy 90 Day Bible schedule and noticed that the two were not happily the same. (I haven't even read a thing for the last two days, now that's just pure laziness on my part).
At this point I was still living an illusion. Then I read this post at 1+1+1=1. At that moment the rose coloured glasses that I was wearing fell off my face and I saw my reality. I am in a similar season as Carisa. So I had a quick discussion with me and I decided that...
- I'm choosing to finish what I started, just not when I had planned.
- I'm not a non-finisher.
- I am a finisher.
- I don't have to do what the other bloggy mommy's are doing to be cool.
hey, and maybe I will finish on time???
nah, probably not.
God is good and He still loves me.